Just saw this on Twitter. An awesome idea for players who are stuck and for DMs to foster more involvement from your party in the world. @probablynpcrpgideas
It just occurred to me that, out of the whole Smash Bros cast, the pair who probably have the most to talk about in terms of swapping war stories are Kirby and Bayonetta.
Please, expand on this point. My instinct is to believe you, but I’d like to hear your evidence.
Loves candy and playing dress-up
Constantly having their beauty sleep interrupted by seemingly minor annoyances that somehow escalate into universe-ending threats
Main problem-solving approach is to find the nearest eldritch abomination and punch it
Steps dogged by thematically similar frenemy who keeps finding excuses to duel them for the fate of the world (it’s getting a bit weird)
Just came out to have a good time and is honestly feeling so attacked right now
Has canonically beat up God
Yes, but how many times has Bayonetta accidentally unleashed the eldritch abomination she had to punch to solve her problems while trying to get back her candy that’s been stolen by the individual or group of individuals she was trying to track down to beat up in order to recover her candy?
Because that’s happened to Kirby at least once (Squeak Squad)
Now, I’m not saying that has happened to Bayonetta, but you’ve gotta admit it’s completely plausible that it could.
Alien royalty that come from a race of superpowered barbarians that have super strength, speed, flight, and energy blasts, with their powers coming from a combination of strong emotions and solar energy, who both start off as hostile but tone down and become heroic after falling in love with a human.
having a 3yo brother means i get exposed to kids’ shows way more often than i thought i would at this point in my life, but man, binge watching thomas the tank engine as an adult is a wild fucking experience
all these trains (and there’s like 20 counting locomotives alone, don’t even get me started on the anthropomorphic train cabins) are MAD competitive the whole time and will constantly fuck up their own whole day by tring to prove they’re the biggest baddest train. and like, i understand that you gotta get you plot from somewhere and i imagine plotlines like this happen in cars etc. as well, but the other day i was watching and i noticed that all these goddamn locomotives have DRIVERS in them. that apparently have no control over their train’s actions at all whatsoever. so these trains wake up, pick up their drivers, go to work, get taunted by another train who’s like “ha ha i see u there with your 4 cabins but did you know i can pull SIX cabins and still fucking book it at 80mph” and the 4 cabin train will be like “fuck it i gotta prove myself now, hook me up with 4 more cabins” and will inevitably derail themselves or some shit while the engine driver just shuts up and kicks back the whole time
i explained this to my brother and was like, is that fucked up or what, but he just pointed at the green train and went “that’s percy” so i guess that’s his take on the situation
I always thought it was funny that your player character in Pokemon is 10 years old. Like, yeah, they’re “anime ten” where they look at least 18 yadda yadda, but they’re still ten.
Imagine the people in the Pokemon League. These are fully grown adults, right? They’ve trained their entire lives to be the best trainers in their country. They’re the best of the best. And then a ten year old walks in. A high and mighty four foot tall ten year old with a big smile on their face walks in. They’ve never even seen a tity. They don’t know where babies come from. They’re ten.
How did this ten year old get in to your arena? Did they wander in here by mistake? They say they’re here to battle you. Aww, how cute. This kid wants to fight the big league trainers, so they snuck in to fight you. That’s cute and funny. You’ll tell the others about this next lunch break. You decide to humor the kid and accept their challenge. You toss out your level 50 Tyranitar. You and this Pokemon have spent decades together, you trained for ages to get it to Level 50. You’re the best trainer in the country.
The kid reaches on their belt and tosses a Master Ball. Wait, what? A Master Ball? How did that kid get a Master Ball? Out of the master ball pops…
God.
God popped out of the Master Ball.
The very same God Pokemon that controls the flow of space, that you go to church and pray to every Sunday.
This ten year old kid just pulled out a Master Ball and threw God at you. God is, in fact, Level 73.
God shoots Hyper Beam at your life-long partner Tyranitar, causing it to evaporate in to dust. He’s fainted in one hit. The kid yawns.
The kid wipes your entire party of Pokemon, the Pokemon you spent most of your adult life training and caring for. You are stunned. You ask the trainer how long they’ve been doing this. They say “I started a couple of days ago.”
Conclusion: Voldemort was the most useless, magic dependant wizard that ever existed. He could have lived till like 200 if he just ate well and exercised, but no he had to go and split up his soul and ruin perfectly good jewellery, fucking dumbass.
this sounds like it was written by hermione granger at 1 am
He tried to use an advanced death magic spell to kill a baby. He literally doesn’t know how to do anything without magic. Just drop it out a window my dude, babies are so delicate
Okay so like there are vampires but one of the side effects of becoming a vampire is that you can’t explicitly tell people you’re a vampire.
Like, if they already know you’re a vampire, that’s cool and you can talk about it with them whenever. And if they don’t know but are straight up like “hey are you a vampire?” you can be like “yes I am” and then you can talk to them about being a vampire because they already know now.
But the point is you can’t tell people.
So you’ve got this vampire who really wants to tell their friends and they’re dropping all these hints and being as obvious as they possibly can be but their friends just think they over-exaggerate everything.
“Hey, when did you learn to lock pick?” “Sometime around the middle ages, I think.” “Okay, fine, I won’t pry then.”
“Cool shirt! When did you get it?” “Oh, about fifty years ago or so.” “Dude you weren’t even alive. It’s a hand-me-down, then?”
“Hey check out this cool Renaissance painting.” *points to a person lying dramatically on the ground* “That’s me.” “Haha, that totally would be you. I’m the one getting his head chopped off.” “No, you don’t get it that’s actually me.” “God, I know. You’re so dramatic.”
“How long has it been since you’ve been to Europe?” “A couple centuries at least.”
“What’s this red drink in your fridge?” “Blood.” “Is it that new diet drink?” “No, it’s blood.” “No, seriously. I’m thinking about trying this diet. Does it work?” *sighs* “No.”
“How come you don’t have any mirrors in your house?” “I don’t have a reflection.” “Cool. It’s really admirable that you’re not letting society’s expectations dictate your life.”
“Hey, it’s really sunny out today. Wanna go for a walk?” “No. I will literally burn up and die.” “Fine, stay inside and watch Netflix. That’s cool too.”
“I heard these coffin beds are really supposed to help you sleep. I’ve never seen one this cool though. Where’d you get it?” “I was buried in it.” “Fine. Don’t tell me.”
“Dude, why are you always so cold?” “I’m dead.” “No, really. I think you might be anemic. Are you getting enough iron?”
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